The fruits of New-Canada grow wild in Manitoba’s capital where it’s better than it looks… Really!
TOURISM | ENTERTAINMENT
The Can News – Winnipeg, MB
Wake up to the future in Winnipeg.
Haven’t visited in a while? Well, it’s time to return. Our arms are as open as our southern border ready for anyone wanting a warm embrace on a blizzardly night.
Winnipeg: Vast, vigorous and virtuous. The legacy of Historical Hero Louis Riel comes alive on city streets, where free camping is available all day everyday on any public sidewalk. Stay warm on cool days with a Metis sash presented to all our visitors during their stay.
Winnipeg: Where free-range youth groups relieve guests of burdensome baggage like purses, wallets and watches.
Karen Prozac, a tourist from Portland – Oregon visiting Winnipeg, MB for the first time.
“I am amazed by the quality of life here! It’s cleaner and much safer than Portland…” says Karen.
Where hand sanitizer has replaced hand soap and masking isn’t mandatory, but don’t stand out, please.
Where Red River fecal gases keep residents alive, alert and constantly aware of their surroundings – until they’re behind the steering wheel. Where the tangle of streets begs you to stay where you are and enjoy the riverside scents and scenery. Where emergency syringes are available for use in any public park, donated by jittery, CF Polo Park Mall coffee baristas and washed clean by the magical sterilization of an Arctic winter.
Stay warm on cool days with a Metis sash presented to all our visitors during their stay.
Saving the best for last, Canada’s proud and powerful anus boasts 11 cannabis stores for every four liquor marts. When you come, come to party.
Winnipeg: Shining A Light on Socialist Sophistication
– Brought to you by the City of Winnipeg Tourism Council…. “It’s better than it looks.”
